Today I had an awesome day just hanging out with a friend. We went out for lunch... did a little shopping... but mainly just visited. It has been a rough year for me... and I think it is about to get even more interesting.
This whole summer has been sort of a "hurry up and wait" type of scenario.... always anticipating another trip back to PA... and so not getting too involved... not getting too comfortable... not starting (or finishing really) any projects because of potential interruptions... etc. It has sort of been like living in limbo.
It's been rather silly in a way... no one knows how many tomorrows you may have... and to wait for some magical time when you anticipate free time to work on things is rediculous. But there it is... and there I was.... not working on things because I was either too depressed... too sick... too anxious.... or waiting for the proverbial shoe to drop when I would have to go again.
My father has been home from the hospital for 16 days I think... if I have counted right... and I have been asked to come. My father has been irritable... anxious... in alot of pain... and helpless to do anything for himself. My mom, though she has tried her best... and done quite well... is at the point where she wants/needs my help... and so I will go.
Tomorrow I will try to get the Jeep checked over to make sure it is "road ready".... get some stuff together.... get things finished up as much as I can before I head out on another cross-country trip.
I feel like I should have been more prepared for this moment... especially what with anticipating it for several weeks now... and yet... I am not.
--->photos by Elaine A. Russell
