I once had a discussion with my sister. She was sorta teasing/ sorta snarking at me because she thought I got so very much done all the time. I laughed inwardly. Kathy was in the throws of cancer though -- and I understood her lack of energy. Having had cancer myself (albeit not anywhere near as bad), and having had been diagnosed with Lupus in 92...I've certainly had my "down" days. It was funny to me... because I don't see myself as accomplishing a whole lot on a day to day basis. There are days when I don't get anything done at all.
I don't know if it's the Lupus, or having worked night shift for so very many years... but lots of nights I just don't sleep. So.. I try to make use of the time. I putz quietly (I hope) around the house... I try to catch up on mail, dusting... quiet things. As much as I am not fond of Walmart... it also allows me to go get groceries and things like that when normal people are asleep. Tonight, I got the groceries, and got gas in the car at 4am. Why ? Because... you never know when you will be able to sleep.. and this way I can do things while I am awake and sorta have energy.. and I rest later when I can. It gives me the luxury of doing things... when I can.. and usually in small batches to match my energy level. I have even planted my garden and weeded the flower beds at midnight. I have driven around and taken photos. I have done mending. Strange, I know... but you do what you can when you are able.
Course, there are some days I feel fine.. and get along with business as usual.... at least in the eyes of most people.
What I have been given is a gift. There is a definate magik in the night world that alot of people just don't get to experience. Owls hoot. Coyotes howl. Bunnies scamper about. People are busy stocking shelves, yet not so busy that they can't talk to you... say.. about onions (like tonight). There is a steady hum.... not a rush... to the movement of things. The moon can be glorious. The clouds move about in a timeless fashion to lighten (or not) the night skies. The wind can whisper. The mountains can sing... and then the dawn comes.
*photos by Elaine A. Russell